Fred Pearce, consultant
The South Pars Special Economic Energy Zone, home of the world's largest gas field, shared between Iran and Qatar (Image: KeystoneUSA-ZUMA/Rex Features)
And the winner is...Qatar. The tiny super-rich Gulf state's search for global recognition now boasts not just the soccer World Cup in 2022, but UN climate negotiations in 2012.
The announcement was made at the current climate talks in Durban, South Africa, today.
Qatar has the world's highest per-capita carbon dioxide emissions. At more than 50 tonnes a head, they are seven times those of Britain and more than triple those of the United States.
Qatar won't wreck the planet on its own. The thumb-shaped sand spit sticking out from Saudi Arabia is only about the size of Connecticut and its population is less than that of Little Rock, Arkansas.
But it's hardly a pioneer of a greener path to growth.
In the past two years, Qatar has announced a series of eye-catching initiatives to promote green technology. But campaigners say these will remain "greenwash" as long as the country keeps up its spendthrift energy habits. For example, it supplies electricity to households free of charge, however much they use, most of which comes from burning natural gas. Households also get free water, even though every drop from is made by energy-intensive desalination of sea water.
As a result, despite being a desert nation, Qatar has one of the highest per-capita rates of water use in the world, averageing 400 litres per person per day. And Qatar's carbon dioxide emissions are more than five times what they were in 1990, the starting date for Kyoto targets.
Most of Qatar's soaring emissions come from its huge offshore gas extraction industry. Under its emir, Sheikh Hamad bin Khalifa Al Thani, the country is the world's biggest exporter of natural gas. As a result, it also has the world's highest per-capita income. But one of the quirks of the Kyoto protocol is that super-rich super-polluting Gulf nations are exempt from emissions targets because they are deemed to be developing nations.
That is a convenient club to be a member of. But negotiators in Durban this week might try looking out for signs that the sheikh's delegation will be willing to accept emissions targets in future.
Mind you, it's not unheard of for UN climate negotiations are hosted by big polluters. Their present hosts are a case in point.
Partly thanks to its heavy reliance on coal from vast mines in Mpumalanga province, South Africa is responsible for about 40 per cent of Africa's carbon emissions from fossil fuel burning. Its per-capita emissions are higher than those in Britain, even though its per-capita GDP is only a sixth of Britain's.
And, just up the coast from the site of this week's talks in Durban is Richards Bay, a huge deep-water harbour that is home to the world's largest coal export terminal. Mining giants Anglo American and BHP Billiton ship up to 91 million tonnes of coal from there to Europe and Asia each year. Really diligent conference-goers might like to skip the safari and take a visit there when the talks are over.
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